5 ways to win at ping-pong


if there’s one thing you need to know about method (aside from the fact that we make awesome cleaning products), it’s that we take ping pong very seriously. we recently completed our  annual march madness ping pong doubles tournament, with lucy s. + josh paddling in for the win. below, they share some of their best kept ping pong secrets (even if it’s lucy doing most of the talking):

1. three words: low. cut. shirts. three more words: on josh, obviously.

2. look the part. josh has his own 29-year-old paddle, which he keeps in his desk drawer. he saved the money he made working at a deli in high school to buy it—and it psyches people out. it’s kind of like having your own bowling ball. are you good at bowling? maybe. but when you roll in with your own bowling ball, you’d better believe people take notice. if you’re lucky, they’re like, “hey dude, great bowling ball. can i buy you a pretzel?” by the way, josh takes his pretzels with mustard.

3. play up your strengths. josh has a crazy top spin-slicey serve that is nearly impossible to return. my skill is getting the ball over the net 80% of the time. together, we’re like katniss and peeta, united in victory. but just to be clear, josh has a lovely wife, sally, who also works at method (hi sally!), and i have a husband who came into the office during the playoffs and wondered why we were all drinking at 3 p.m. on a wednesday.

4. practice, or not. josh doesn’t practice because he doesn’t want people to scope his game. i practice a lot, which perhaps made people think i was faking at being mediocre. that, of course, would have taken more talent than just being good. so, it was like reverse-reverse psychology. which i guess just makes it psychology.

5. as in all things in life, just get the ball over the net. maybe they return it handily. maybe it comes back at you faster than you sent it. maybe it hits you in the boob. but every once in a while, it’s a point. and enough of those is a win.

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